Wednesday, November 24, 2010

ThanksGiving Day Ahead....

  ThanksGiving Day is Ahead.....So I'm writing and trying to do some reflecting.

I wonder how many have actually stopped to think about what they are truly thankful for at this time of year. It always seems to be over-shadowed by the impending Christmas Holidays and the First Day of crazy shopping. I am thankful for many things, and yes, even when it sounds cliché, my family, friends, and my health....But are we really, or is that the Politically Correct thing to say so no one thinks evil of us??

How many times are we thrilled that the kids are finally at school, would opt out of date night because you really don't want to sit there and talk about boring mundane things that we've already talked about a thousand times, all you do is make everyone feel great about themselves all day every day, all you get is tired, longing for your bed and a cup of coffee with a strong something, something, just so you can curl up and hopefully sleep....Oh, did I say that out loud?? Before you become offended or gasp in horror, stop and think how true it is at different points in our lives. We all become in creditably tired in today’s lifestyle many times with work, school, all of our different obligations; then we add on our own personal families and all that we do with and/or for them. Then the holidays come and we have get-togethers then we go to, and worry about the who’s who’s of parties or dinners to go to. It’s exhausting just thinking about it!

Then you stop and think, what it would be like if certain people entered your life. Even if you’ve had good or bad experiences with them; the people in your life has help make up the kind of person you are. I am undoubtedly someone who constantly wonders if I should’ve had kiddos. I am high-strung at times, moody, just all over emotionality. When I’m up, man I can be the life of the party; but when I’m an angry and hurt, its best no one comes within throwing or screaming distance of me. I’m truly a mix of parents emotions topped with years of insecurity-how’s that for an ad??? I heard once on the radio-“Would you date yourself?” Um, no, I would run far, far, away….What you see is what you get at that one point and time, a bit of Camlin, I can blend into any situation I’m in, I where my heart on my sleeves and am an open book pretty much, but on the flip side highly private…how’s that for ironic? One person will think they know me, and I’m sure if you talked to another friend they would say you’re totally wrong; however you’ both be right as I am a dimensional person with many sides to me. One person who has loved for all my sides, shapes, and sizes is my husband. He is someone who has been there through all the drama deserves a medal! It’s not easy for a guy; although it is fun to torment them from time to time just because yah can!  (How horrible am I?) It isn’t always easy, but many times well worth the effort and time you sink into any relationship. Even if they are only a part of your life for a short time or the rest of life, be thankful for the love and joys you did/do have. Each person in your life has brought to or from another place in your life. Even if it’s a horrible relationship you’re becoming a stronger person just for knowing you need to move on and have a healthy relationship.

I had my children very early in life (19 when pregnant with James), and it caused a lot of emotional problems in the long run. I don’t blame them or resent them, but it’s been an adjustment to life. I wasn’t ready by any means to have children. My husband (21) was ready for the most part for a family; but he too at times wishes we had that honeymoon stage like most couples get at times in our lives; just to kinda grow-up ourselves and adjust to each other. So instead of having fun with friends and attending college, we were being grown-ups and playing house. It wasn’t always horrible or that our kiddos (2 more came within 2.5 yrs) were even bad babies; it was just a lot to deal with some who was a free and at times wild spirited. I love them however so very much, and they have helped me grow-up and brought me to be the kind of mother I want to be. I used to want to be the kind of soft-spoken always sweet mommy that so many other folks were. I wasn’t raised that way, and my children have almost always been raised like little adults. However, they crawl up on my lap and just melt my heart, and all I want to do is spoil them. It’s so funny, I jump at the chance to get away, then as soon as I am leaving, I start freaking out; “What if something happens? What if they forgot monkey or Rexy? Did I leave our cell numbers in enough places?” Ironic?? As we settle into who we are becoming we realize that even though our family didn’t start we would want it to, it started and we would be lost without it. They have made me a better person for believing in me to be a great mom. I feel so unqualified and undeserving of these guys; they love me despite me being me! How many people can do that?? I still have a long way to go in being a good parent, but with each step they still love me, and reach to hold my hand to steady me along the way; shouldn’t it be the other way around??

So yes for this Thanksgiving I am truly Thankful for my Family, especially since they put up with me all year long! At this time of year it’s nice to be able to put all of the family discourse, annoyances, and bickering on hold for few days of the year. I wouldn’t trade these guys for the world, well maybe for a Spa Day every once in a while!  But what woman wouldn’t!!! I can’t wait to have my little chef helpers in the Kitchen with me; Ethan is showing lots of promise in the kitchen and I just might have Fireman-Chef on my hands. He wants to drive the trucks and cook for the guys-something I thrilled about!! Megan is enjoying cooking and I can’t wait till she can do it on her own, and seems to be a great way for her to learn to listen to me without it being go clean your room!  James enjoys cooking but is the guy for kitchen duty, so he ends up reading a book or writing a story-which is fine with me; most guys make great pizza and mac+cheese! They can’t wait to be able to eat all day and wear the hats the made at school! I am worried however that already my 9 yr. old eats more than me, and he can literally eat all day, how I am going to feed this guy when he’s a teenager??!! Then I’ll have 3 at once!!! Great!! I am glad James will be practicing Law by then!!!

So no matter what your traditions are this Thanksgiving, please stop and think about how different people have affected your life in various ways and let people know that you are thankful for their impact on your life. I am thankful for so many things this year, despite it being still a rough year, I still have all 3 of my children in good health (-icky noses), a husband who works very hard for us, and my health. I am thrilled the children are coming of age to help prepare and do things with us, and put their own inputs on how they would do it! I am also thankful for a warm house, electricity to cook with, and all the modern technology to keep all of linked together!!

So be Thankful, Enjoy Family &Friends, Eat, Drink, and Be MERRY!!!
Happy ThanksGiving to all of our Family and Friends!!!

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